Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Today

The first thing Grayden said to me this morning was " I had a dream that Storey had pizza for breakfast.  Can I?"  I don't know if he really had that dream or if he came up with that on the spot, if so, that's pretty impressive.  He also found black spray paint and sprayed a small part of the side of our house today.  What an adorable little vandal.  He also fell while jumping on his bed and hit his eyebrow on the window ledge and it gave him a nasty black goose egg.  When I dropped an open bag of graham crackers while standing at the pantry, he ran in like a flash, grabbed a cracker off the ground, and ran away as quickly as he could...I kid you not, if I had blinked twice I would have not seen him at all, he went that fast.

Yesterday Grayden and I had a little...big....run in at dinner time.  I know I let it go on too long, but he wouldn't eat while the family ate, so we all finished and left the table...which is the worst punishment for him...solitude......and instead of eating he kept leaving the table...got sent to his room until he was ready to take some bites.....came back to the table and still wouldn't eat....until finally I was practically forcing his mouth open and sticking a forkful of food in.  Mean nasty mom.  That made me think....I would really hate to watch a video of all my bad mom moments.  When I get frustrated, or lose my temper, or my patience, or when I'm lazy, or self-involved.  And I would really not want someone else to see that movie either, because it doesn't represent who I am.  I have great mother moments, too, and on average I think I do okay, but I thinkit would be hard to convince someone of that if the knew my worst moments.  I'm actually quite glad that I don't know every detail about the lives of the people I know.  Especially the bad stuff.  It would be hard not to think about it when I see them.  It would probably be hard not to make judgements about the kind of people they are, even though I know that my worst moments don't show the real me, the good person I try hard to be.  I know the scripture says "I, The Lord, will remember them no more" when talking about our mistakes, but we humans, we remember everything.  Sometimes it works out okay, my spouse and I definitely know the good the bad and the ugly about each other and we can still be happy and in love, but I think in the vast majority of circumstances those worst moments are best filed away and forgiven and forgotten.  (This totally ties in with my last post about prophets!  Judging people on their worst mistakes!)

Speaking of the "ugly", today Nate and I took the kids to a new little grocery store, and I looked abysmal.  I hardly got ready today, and then ran around like a maniac, it was muggy and rainy, by the time dinner was made and then eaten and we had to leave for the store I was disgusting and wearing mismatched clothes and I grabbed the closest shoes to the door (striped Toms) and we were on our way.  After a quick glance in the rear view mirror I told Nate I looked like the "before" picture on a makeover special.  He didn't seem to mind being seen with me, though.  Glad he still loves me after seeing me at my worst, both in life and in appearance.

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